Awake and Unafraid

Gwenny Gone-y

2009-03-22T15:34:00.000+08:00

CLICK ON FROG FOR PRESENT O.O

if it looks like i'm laughing, i'm really just asking to leave

2009-03-18T20:13:00.005+08:00

Later - Mayish?

More honest, more brutal, cutting edge. *I'm gg to be like this to anyone I don't see the need to be... "nice" to, so to speak =]

Less lying, more cryptics with hidden meanings. *Definitely gg to be a sort of "Read between the lines and see my middle finger's in disguise" kind of thing :)

More meaning, less uselessness, more thinking, less triviality,
so sick of smothering
so sick of your whiny crap
so sick of your stupid face giving that DISGUSTING look
so sick of you thinking you're so superior
so sick of people smothering (2)
so sick of being buried, i can hardly breathe (3)
so sick of bodily harm
so sick of life, by all means, NO, does not mean i'm giving up
so sick of your thick-headedness
so sick of being wrong
so sick of being pushed around
so sick of you trampling all over - doesn't mean that don't say anything = don't mind
so sick of people not asking before they take (jeez basic courtesy)
so sick of not being able to strive
so sick of everything
so sick of talking
so sick of breathing

so sick of you and your stupid problems. just because i look out, does not give you the right to continue dreaming, i'm glad i let you fall. maybe when you hit your head you'll finally knock some sense into you

i'm so thankful for dense friends who save my life with mindless drabble
i'm so thankful for friends who keep their distance when they know i'm not feeling up to it
i'm so thankful for friends who care
i'm so thankful for words that save, bring me back to earth
i'm so thankful for every little encouraging thing you said, cause it really helped to know *tears up*
i'm so thankful for someone to cry on
i'm so thankful for most things
i'm so thankful some of you provided a breathing hole for me when i was smothered,
i'm so thankful for you guys putting up with my ridiculous whims
i'm so thankful for us sticking together no matter what :P

i think too much and i'm so sorry (note sarcasm), if i apologise i've given some thought into it, if i didn't then i must have seen no reason in doing so. if you feel you deserve an apology, hit me up, i'll explain why i don't deem you fit of an apology (:

everything has a REASON,
everything has an OUTCOME,
everything has it's own course of running,
we call that "fate" or "destiny" hurrah!

Falling, yes I am falling (She keeps calling me back) !

2009-03-17T22:11:00.004+08:00

NCO COURSE DAY ONE

and someone was being a biat.ch by pumping us ON HOT GROUND
until some of us skin peeled and blistered
the ground... hot hot is it ahh
you go to a road on a blistering day
and go do push up position
and imagine doing it for 30 push ups
bitchy. i know.
though it was partly our fault
OUR means those idiots who kept defying what they said.

HAHAHA IT WAS BLOODY AWSOME LA AFT THAT THE "biat.ch" GOT SCOLDED HAHAHAAH OMGOMG XDD
my palms are still red -.- crap lol. wayne's face while pumping was like "ORGGHHHHHHHHH" (sfx: SUPER in pain groan) after that see his hand got blister O_O hakim and shaun also haha :X
then campcraft my team v unlucky haha we damn slow lol idk why xDD then held back the others too (sorry!) we suck lol we kept snapping twines till none left and then we could not do the tent HAHAHA omg (second time) so lucky la please! you see the other group had to do it twice in ONE TIME WE DID lol lol does not that give you enough impression how long we took AHAHAHAHAH xDD we took like 30 min haha xD

then aft camp craft... i stupidly asked shiggy to help me pull and untie the slipknot and ended up getting rope burn ROARRRRR! @.@ then i ran for waterbreak and... tripped over the god damn band wire and bruised my knees haha. found out that ritesh also kenna but his worse O_____O like 3/4 palm blistered and he skinned his arm omg D: then sir daniel play play and v funny try to use masking tape to bandage ritesh and it looked awfully funny xD! he looked like a downright joke kekekeke x: so then came back to help them w the tent and pissed the ICs off haha walao

i am so sunburnt that i look like a lobster u.u

Before I Wake; " it was the hope in their faces that awakened me, that reminded me of what a gift i had received"

2009-03-16T22:54:00.003+08:00

"When you want to judge someone walk a mile in their shoes first"

that goes without saying that... if you want to say something or even god damn think something, i just wish you'd clear it up. i don't like it when you twist my words (given this situation where the twisting was quite severe and not at all playful), and spread around that i said whatever. doesn't matter if you did it on purpose or just because you heard wrongly, i don't give a damn. you want to talk shit about me, (and not just like rumors cause rumors aren't all that vicious if you think about it). you're the one who sew the seeds of chaos in this friendship. don't be all that surprised. still i am annoyed that you came to a conclusion by yourself. (making a conclusion about somebody else w/o even discussing). i want to tear you apart, but you aren't worth both the effort and time,

all i want to say is, if you keep harbouring such feelings and... never opening up to clarify, you aren't as pure and untainted as you'd like to believe... you may be the one at fault sometimes.. yet to me it just feels like you're using others as a thing to blame.. and something to run away from. you keep running and at the end of the day you'll find that.. you never really learned anything about people huh. look all around you. you fucking sew the seeds for discord in a lot of things. i guess what you truly want is me to be alone. even if you try to convince yourself whatever you say to me is for the best.. yeah, ever thought that to me it would seem like you just want to alienate me? no? oh well, too bad.

you just always keep me away, you start something then stop it. i don't even want to care anymore. find somebody else who will give a damn about you even though you're not worth all the damage >_> go on, just keep thinking all those bad things about me, how i carry on doesn't concern you, if i felt like telling you my things, i would :> but i don't haha so don't just so thinking i'm stuck up cause of that. that's your folly, i'll try my best not to get entangled with you.

walk a mile in my shoes, i walked in yours, i understood. can't you just.. grant me the same amount of effort? -_-

food for thought : have you ever hated someone?

You can hate a person just by looking at her/him: the hair, the smile, the look, the clothes. Anything can trigger negative feelings. You just have to go with that flow and any proof that person is not horrible will have no influence on you.

I don’t know if we could say a good thing about every person we’ve met so far, maybe they haven’t impressed us in a positive way, but we can most certainly bitch about all of them. There must have been something to annoy us at one point. It’s only human! For every nice gesture and person who smiled thanks to you, there is an unhappy person, someone who feels neglected or discriminated against.

It’s human to be annoyed, but above that, I think it’s human to be hatable (being available for hate).

We are hatable with every gesture, every choice we make and tear we drop. Because all these are movements on a map filled with people and, inevitably, when we go one way we get closer to some and estrange from others. We are, in essence, controversial.

Some are more controversial than others, true. It depends on how far we move from the center of the map or, in other words, how extremist we are. And how much we show of our personality we show to others. But still, we are always lovable to some and hatable to others.

That’s the breakthrough. We’re both good and evil, pleasant and repulsive, smart and stupid. It only depends on where we’re standing when we’re judging. There is no black and white. And that’s why the big picture is important: we need to see the balance between the smiles and the tears someone provokes. And the reasons. The intentions. The more information we have, the better we see the tone of gray.

Anyway, we are hatable. That’s our most human trait. Every person stands for the things another one hates. That’s life.

hate me please, prove you're human :-P

haha crystal i'm not the only one that feels that whatever i see in people and dislike i automatically realize it's a part of me cause..

If you hate a person, you hate something in him that is a part of yourself. What isn't part of ourselves doesn't disturb us.
Hermann Hesse ['Demian', 1919]

this hermann hesse fellow thinks so too :>

so much hatred in the world these days ..

It is my conviction that killing under the cloak of war is nothing but an act of murder. Albert Einstein

2009-03-15T21:20:00.004+08:00

even though i haven't seen you in years..
yours is a funeral i'd fly to from anywhere
haha gavin was v offended.

what we need now is..WORLD PISS says:
*thanks
*what a great friend
*first thing you talk to me about is my funeral

food for thought : "Auntie" / "Uncle" vs "Madam" / "Sir"

seriously speaking.. what's the big fuss? the obvious choice would most be "Auntie" imo, because if you look at it in the civil servant's point of view, it’s not as if they work for YOU, so why would they be inclined to address you as “Madam” or “Sir”? honestly, it's so rude to cut someone off and demand they address you in such terms. it’s like you're telling them in the face that you're more superior,

in the newspaper some points raised as to why being referred to as “Auntie” is a plus point is that it is a sign of our Asian Heritage and a sign of Respect.In the eyes of a customer service employee (or in other words a civil servant of some sort), their main job would be to well, fulfil your needs to an extent,

it is not as if they belong to you and are at your beck and call. To demand they address you at such a stature would be bloody naive and rude to them, it is utterly disrespectful and uncouth. Unless the servicer is older than you and calls you “Auntie” I can see how you might take offense, but there is still no reason to be so rude! In that case just politely ask them to refer to you as “XiaoJie” or something right ._.

honestly what's the big fuss >_>

food for thought 2 : MSN 3! :D
it's so adorable! i swear!
given the format could be further brushed up... but still! it's adorable if not a bit ugly :>

don't do anything stupid k girl cause FO* will always be ther for you ^_______^
have a nice trip with your family love

is glas iad na cnoic ata i bhfad uainn !

2009-03-14T10:20:00.002+08:00

the grass on far away hills are greener - the grass is greener on the other side

whenwefall may be a tad metal/hardcore in some of their songs but this one is catchy and meaningful in a sense :-O kay understatement, it's awesome.

absolutely adorable afiq and pengda ^____^

sunshine with ugly hair :-P staring with shao :-O

not to mention the funniest thing i came across:

haha this was made supposedly by isolating a few seconds in the movie and making it into a gif image :-P

What is intelligence, anyway? When I was in the army, I received the kind of aptitude test that all soldiers took and, against a normal of 100, scored 160. No one at the base had ever seen a figure like that, and for two hours they made a big fuss over me. (It didn't mean anything. The next day I was still a buck private with KP - kitchen police - as my highest duty.)

All my life I've been registering scores like that, so that I have the complacent feeling that I'm highly intelligent, and I expect other people to think so too. Actually, though, don't such scores simply mean that I am very good at answering the type of academic questions that are considered worthy of answers by people who make up the intelligence tests - people with intellectual bents similar to mine?

For instance, I had an auto-repair man once, who, on these intelligence tests, could not possibly have scored more than 80, by my estimate. I always took it for granted that I was far more intelligent than he was. Yet, when anything went wrong with my car I hastened to him with it, watched him anxiously as he explored its vitals, and listened to his pronouncements as though they were divine oracles - and he always fixed my car.

Well, then, suppose my auto-repair man devised questions for an intelligence test. Or suppose a carpenter did, or a farmer, or, indeed, almost anyone but an academician. By every one of those tests, I'd prove myself a moron, and I'd be a moron, too. In a world where I could not use my academic training and my verbal talents but had to do something intricate or hard, working with my hands, I would do poorly. My intelligence, then, is not absolute but is a function of the society I live in and of the fact that a small subsection of that society has managed to foist itself on the rest as an arbiter of such matters.

Consider my auto-repair man, again. He had a habit of telling me jokes whenever he saw me. One time he raised his head from under the automobile hood to say: "Doc, a deaf-and-mute guy went into a hardware store to ask for some nails. He put two fingers together on the counter and made hammering motions with the other hand. The clerk brought him a hammer. He shook his head and pointed to the two fingers he was hammering. The clerk brought him nails. He picked out the sizes he wanted, and left. Well, doc, the next guy who came in was a blind man. He wanted scissors. How do you suppose he asked for them?"
Indulgently, I lifted by right hand and made scissoring motions with my first two fingers. Whereupon my auto-repair man laughed raucously and said, "Why, you dumb jerk, He used his voice and asked for them." Then he said smugly, "I've been trying that on all my customers today." "Did you catch many?" I asked. "Quite a few," he said, "but I knew for sure I'd catch you." "Why is that?" I asked. "Because you're so goddamned educated, doc, I knew you couldn't be very smart."

Isaac Asimov is the new sex :-O
read it and weep :>

food for thought :
"In the spring of 2003, three young filmmakers traveled to Africa in search of a story. What started out as a filmmaking adventure transformed into much more when these boys from Southern California discovered a tragedy that disgusted and inspired them, a tragedy where children are both the weapons and the victims.

After returning to the States, they created the documentary "Invisible Children: Rough Cut," a film that exposes the tragic realities of northern Uganda.s night commuters and child soldiers.

The film was originally shown to friends and family, but has now been seen by millions of people. The overwhelming response has been, "How can I help?" To answer this question, the non-profit Invisible Children, Inc. was created, giving compassionate individuals an effective way to respond to the situation."

-http://www.invisiblechildren.com/home.php

When we fall we will pick up the pieces- we know that we'll never be down for too long!

2009-03-12T21:41:00.005+08:00

i'm going to be an asshole and tear you apart.

"Nowadays, I can see so many immature people who can't seem to think properly. Not in terms of intelligence of course,but it's got to do with respect and trust. And I know some people who agrees with me on that."

im⋅ma⋅ture

–adjective

1.	not mature, ripe, developed, perfected, etc.

2.	emotionally undeveloped; juvenile; childish.

what exactly has being immature got to do with not thinking properly? oh immature people do think properly, kid, just because you don't see their reasoning does not mean you have to force your god damn point and make them change their views.

respect and trust, granted you might be overflowing with "trust" , you have a tendency to put all your faith (basically, trust) in one person and you KNOW , you fucking are WELL AWARE that they WILL let you down so why the hell are you carrying on this behavior? yeah right you want to believe in that person and give them a second chance. (pls sense sarcasm)

you're not fooling anyone with that bullshit. all you want is a reason to whine and bitch about your FAILED relationship, your USELESSNESS at understanding proper friendships. friendship, is something that is FORMED OVER TIME, something that takes two parties to cooperate and then forge a bond strong. if you can't even see that YOU'RE the one RUINING all your friendships, then too bad for you. if you keep running away one day when you're left with NOBODY , i just know you will still turn to ignorance.

ever heard of Once Bitten Twice Shy? well you are Always Bitten Never Shy. don't know if that's considered stupid but it's natural human reaction to avoid such things that *bite* us, so to speak. so obviously, you're not being thick skin and all, you're being a prick who just wants attention. yeah right as if you've been alone in the background. you could not see all the friends you had by your side, you had to alienate them with your moodiness and pessimistic views. let's all be frank, nobody likes a wet blanket (:

you have been so blind. just because you want one friend does not mean you have to throw away all your old friends. if a friendship can't WORK, then STOP FORCING IT. god damn why are you being so thick? GIVE UP ALREADY. like i said friendship takes two hands to form, if the other party also does not want to be *close* friends with you then TOO BAD. get over it.

every time you ask someone for their opinion, you fucking have to whine again. why can't you just take their words for it? why must you protest? accept their advice. even though those you have asked may not be very old in terms of age, we are definitely better than you in understanding people (because you so ignorantly choose to wait for friends ++ in other words v 守株待兔) very frankly speaking :)

"There's no point crying over spilled milk. All you could do is to learn your lesson from it, take it as an experience to guide yourself to your goals and dreams."

yaya and look's who talking.. you don't even listen to what you preach. so you have no right :-) do yourself a favour, start listening to YOURSELF and OTHERS instead of FOOLING YOURSELF. ignorance may be bliss but the truth just might save you.

Shutong respect urself, respect others. have some dignity and put ur name, or u r saying that u feel shameful abt the name ur parent give u
Details
20:08 Mar 12, 2009
#
Shutong hey, anonymous taggers, have some balls and put ur name, or else u r just saying that u r a coward. furthermore i can report to the police abt it.

you can't even take advice from your peers, let alone your elder, ya so don't go around scolding/chiding internet people because they don't count. don't make every argument into a personal attack as seen from - "u feel shameful abt the name ur parent give u". try to see it from a positive angle, those anonymous taggers weren't really *anonymous* were they? they did leave a name, no? -.-

anyway from this , at this point, by now, most people would have given up on you =) you don't even realize that there might be some truth in what the anons say. you just jump right in and say "i can report to the police abt it." uhuh, really, would you? face it, any normal person would not kick up such a fuss.

If you moan, bitch or complain
At the bottom is where you'll remain

food for thought : seriously speaking an average human being would be able to have enough common sense to understand and think things through clearly, and every human being would have pillars of support like their friends :-D

anyways if you have no friends... it's probably your fault/your choice. just bear in mind you are removing a potential pillar of support from your life. when we crumble, there may be some who will stand by and watch us fall. but at least take solace in the fact that your true friends ( aka your awesome knights in shining armor ) WILL be there to catch you :) if you let them.

it is natural instinct to avoid things that hurt you, for example when you touch fire and it hurts, you would avoid it the next time no? of course for some of us it may take time to realize the harmful things and et cetera. however with our pillars of support which generally include our peers and family (:, we will be able to overcome amazing odds.

if you want to,
sounds cheesy but attitude is key :-P
hee, anyways bottom line is that you CAN do it if you WANT to,
never doubt yourself.. :-D

He was born with the gift of laughter and a sense that the world was mad.

2009-03-11T20:51:00.002+08:00

i don't think i've smiled that much in one day before...

\b, stay safe ; go see doctor about your puking ! >_>

apparently disk fragging failed so i've got to look into that huh. god damn what the hell is wrong with this .. i hope i haven't been made a *host* of some sort :-/

today i repaid back jiaying's take-16/33-with-you-home ticket since last year hahahah
from "next week" become "next time" heeeeeeeeee :X

feels good to be around girls :/ been in 2c for too long teehee! oh well it's been lovely :) just got back eng today and by some miracle i passed :-O got back chem too it was okay ^o^ this common test has not been awesome but it is not v bad anyway wheeeeeeeee! (apart from failing mt but wdv)

Men occupy very little space on Earth. If the two billion inhabitants of the globe were to stand close together, as they might for some big public event, they would easily fit into a city block that was twenty miles long and twenty miles wide. You could crowed all humanity onto the smallest Pacific islet. Grown-ups, of course, won't believe you. They're convinced they take up much more room. They consider themselves as important as the baobabs. So you should advise them to make their own calculations—they love numbers, and they'll enjoy it. But don't waste your time on this extra task. It's unnecessary. Trust me.

currently fighting the feelings of silently murmuring 'indeed' or shouting a loud "WELL SAID" i murmured :-O

Ten moar days until Lynda migrates off to LA forever T_____________T
well not forever but you get what i mean :-D

food for thought: did you realize red blood cells ( )look like WERTHER'S ORIGNAL'S HARD CANDY!!!!!!!!! aka

and now every time i shake my hand i fear of hearing the unmistakable sound of tablets clacking together.... :-(

Time has told me, you are a rare, rare find. A troubled cure for a troubled mind. And time has told me not to ask for more..

2009-03-10T22:21:00.002+08:00

nadira gived me exclamation mark
bryan says im the _____ one =D
okay report card fr CT

english- later

chi - 42/100
can't say i'm surprised....

chemistry- later

geog- 68/100
should have studied defs more and gotten my a >:

physics- 68/100
aw crap

e.math - 75/100
hurrah o_o

dnt - 26/45
eesh -.-

social studies - later

a.math - Can't remember >_>

1 A1
2 B3
1 C5
1 D7

wheeeeeeeeeeee :D

(For treated indigenously, digenously)

2009-03-09T21:10:00.003+08:00

(Human right is private blue chip, pry)

my smelly dog v scary.. today she she.. she.. swallowed a frog during assembly and and.../breakdown
i got to hug indah :D
i like my medicine a lot :)

abyss feeders are wonderful creatures ; everyone should own one.

on the sad side i cut my nails cause i could not stand the sight of them
on the up side i got 17/25 for geog which was same as jiaying
on the sad side i have vowed to stop talking about claymore as of today :(
[at least until a new chapter comes out anyway]

on the up side it's a monday :>
score of the day : 6/10?

i think i did really well in ignoring people :-O
though i would not consider looking at someone and looking away ignoring..
but if that's what you feel then okay

A lovestruck Romeo, sings the streets a serenade
Laying everybody low with a love song that he made
Finds a streetlight, steps out of the shade
Says something like, "You and me, babe, how about it?"

Juliet says, "Hey, it's Romeo, you nearly gave me a heart attack"
He's underneath the window, she's singing
"Hey, la, my boyfriend's back
You shouldn't come around here, singing up people like that
Anyway, what you gonna do about it?"

Juliet, the dice was loaded from the start
And I bet, and you exploded in my heart
And I forget, I forget.. the movie song
When you gonna realize, it was just that the time was wrong, Juliet?

Come up on different streets, they both were streets of shame
Both dirty, both mean, yes and the dream was just the same
And I dream your dream for you and now your dream is real
How can you look at me, as if I was just another one of your deals?

Well, you can fall for chains of silver, you can fall for chains of gold
You can fall for pretty strangers and the promises they hold
You promised me everything, you promised me thick and thin, yeah
Now you just say, "Oh, Romeo, yeah, you know
I used to have a scene with him"

Juliet, when we made love, you used to cry
I said, "I love you like the stars above, I love you till I die"
And there's a place for us, you know the movie song
When you gonna realize, it was just that the time was wrong, Juliet?

I can't do the talk, like the talk on the TV
And I can't do a love song, like the way it's meant to be
I can't do everything, but I'd do anything for you
I can't do anything except be in love with you

Food for thought : What is the underlying meaning of each song lyric? :D

Give me a reason to believeeeee :)
Cause give me all your poison, and give me all your pain,

I believe we can be extraordinary together rather than ordinary apart

2009-03-07T15:07:00.005+08:00

maybe we wont die alone - exploding emotions (too much to handle)

food for thought 1 : perhaps life itself is heaven?

Maybe we go through life collecting people and places we love,
and they become our heaven

what do you think?
perhaps it is heaven with a little bit of hell mixed in,
(when life does not go our way)
then again we wouldn't have it any other way huh :D

food for thought 2 : Who do you live for?
do you live for your friends?
your family?
your significant other?
your religious idol?
or do you live for yourself?

considering that living for your friends -
is the equivalent of living to please them, constantly wanting their approval.
eg. I started smoking cause my friends told me to.
classic example of peer pressure and whatnot. albeit most bad decisions were made by ourselves do bear in mind the particular circumstances surrounding each choice we have made ;
is it for us? - our benefit etc or is it to fit in? to conform?

living for your family / loved ones / significant other -
is definitely much more noble than living for your friends (blood being thicker than water after all). but still the need to satisfy and continually prove your self worth to people who unconditionally love you (unless you have blatantly led them to love one side of you etc)
then again would it mean that every time you smiled, cracked a joke, laughed, would it really be all for the sake of your family/loved ones. you aren't some knight in shining armor, we are all but super heroes anyways. in the end we are all the same - human. did it ever occur to ourselves that by faking every smile/laugh we might be hurting someone on the other end?

living for your religious idols is just bullshit
namely, living to praise and worship is a pitiful existence altogether. at first it may seem that it is developing your stature etc but you are in fact holding on to false hope =D because in this world (dog-eat-dog) you have to be a cat (hehehehe) and anyways which religious idol would want you to waste your days away worshiping? no offense but as every religious idol does base off a "father" figure, as you do know that our fathers do love us and only want us to be happy (living for OURSELVES) .. i am sure that is not the case -.- so don't even try to convince people you live for your god, *facepalm* XD

living for yourself is a whole new chapter altogether =o
by living for ourselves we are indefinitely tearing away from the mainstream and having a life of our own accordance. however some people will obviously always mix living for YOURSELF and living for OTHERS into a lump sum. by doing this we are inadvertently blinding ourselves to the true beauty of the life we could have =(
so please, just live for yourself, get rid of all your inhibitions and doubts, D:
cause everyone is special, beautiful from within; you are not hidden in the background, those who don't notice you are blind assholes anyway

everyone has their special way of intriguing others
i like the flaws in every person individually, they may seem like fractures in our armor but they are in fact the little things that separates us from others and forms our unique self =D
don't be upset when you compare yourselves with others ; and see that they *seem* luckier
take a second look at things and learn to cherish what you have by your side...
in fact most of the time if you happen to chance upon an opportunity to ask / tell your friends what you envy about them
i'm sure that they will have a truck-full of words to say to you, for all you know they envy you too! =)

after all every friendship (takes two hands to clap) and even if it may seem one-sided, do not falter, it might be the slight of sight O:
our hearts are chock-full of love for everyone we know! (i know it may not seem feasible but i choose to believe that everyone has a good heart T.T)

it all comes down to "I LOVE YOU FOR WHO ARE EVEN THOUGH IT MAY NOT BE YOUR TRUE SELF BUT NO MATTER WHAT I STILL LOVE YOU"

never :
~be afraid that your friends will run away if they know a certain trait you possess
~be callous and take friendships for granted

do :
~take every chance to tell your beloved friends "I LOVE YOU" :D
~compliment them on the little things unique to them xD

concluding statement : true friends will accept you the way you are =D

{Crystal Jiaying Nadira Natalya YuShan Ryan Gavin Jinzhuang Shaokiat Sunshine}
Just to name a few! I love you :D
Thank you for being there for me..
Putting up with my ridiculous antics..
Forgiving me each time I do something stupid / hurt you..
Don't mind my callous words D: I am trying to think before I speak more often

Truth be told I only posted this cause of *,
you're better really hung up and twisted over some girl ditching you..
you always say "don't care her" but yeah sure..
it's plain to see that you do care..
until you finally get over the fact that "SHE IS NOT WORTH IT",
i don't think you'd be able to properly say "i don't care anymore".....
My two cents' worth =D

on a brighter note I have stopped cutting my nails and i am going to see how many days i can stand the sight of my cuticles teehee!

i think i have just exhausted my brain zzzzzzzzz..........

and no i do not appreciate you taking out your frustrations (of your lousy r/s) on me
i may take out my own frustrations on others time to time but the difference between me and you?
IS THAT I MAKE THE EFFORT TO APOLOGISE -.-

picture from : http://cbimg6.com/graphics/09/01/68162b.jpg

We both could see that I needed you, you needed me !

2009-03-06T21:36:00.002+08:00

You are Extroverted, Agreeable, Neurotic and Open

Extroversion:

You have high extroversion.

You are outgoing and engaging, with both strangers and friends.

You truly enjoy being with people and bring energy into any situation.

Enthusiastic and fun, you're the first to say "let's go"!

Conscientiousness:

You have low conscientiousness.

Impulsive and off the wall, you don't take life too seriously.

Unfortunately, you sometimes end up regretting your snap decisions.

Overall, you tend to lack focus, and it's difficult for you to get important things done.

Agreeableness:

You have high agreeableness.

You are easy to get along with, and you value harmony highly.

Helpful and generous, you are willing to compromise with almost anyone.

You give people the benefit of the doubt and don't mind giving someone a second chance.

Neuroticism:

You have medium neuroticism.

You're generally cool and collected, but sometimes you do panic.

Little worries or problems can consume you, draining your energy.

Your life is pretty smooth, but there's a few emotional bumps you'd like to get rid of.

Openness to experience:

Your openness to new experiences is high.

In life, you tend to be an early adopter of all new things and ideas.

You'll try almost anything interesting, and you're constantly pushing your own limits.

A great admirer of art and beauty, you can find the positive side of almost anything.

The Five Factor Personality Test

I feel ill and cranky -.-
I have moar MCs :-O

food for thought =) :

Why do we have to constantly explain our faith? Why are people constantly judging their comrades (fellow christians)?

as you delve into Christianity , many would be able to realize the sheer bizarreness of it all. how completely unorthodox the way of thinking is; as is the way of life in the day of a hard-core Christian. personally after like 6 years of having faith it kinda starts to crumble y/n?
like how come people have to die? food for thought : is it kind of god to give us life (to let us experience a chance) or is it cruel that it has to end.

weigh out the options will you.
kind --> he gives us a shot at living, giving us a taste of what we have
cruel --> on the other hand if he truly wanted us to treasure it then why does he structure this way of life in a way that it has to come to an end?

ponder about it =o
i know some people would be pretty pissed and cry out, "if you question him so much, then why do you even bother to call yourself a christian?!"
yeah but, bear in mind those who say that are most probably recently-turned christians and have a fucking weak position / foundation.

realize that if you read this and get mad, your anger is strictly irrational : because it is directly related to someone not agreeing with you. which is fucking immature and juvenile. how ~~adorable~~.

and secondly,
christians who have the gall to tell you that others that they are bad Christians, are the ones who are bad. i mean, who gives you the RIGHT to tell people how Christians should act? sure we have textbook examples in the bible but other than god/jesus who gave you the holy RIGHT of demeaning others that do not fit up to your standard?

granted you are hard core christians with a strong sense of what you think is right. on the other hand, you have obviously been blinded by your emotions and started to think of yourself as the perfect example of a christian. pardon me, but that doesn't seem so great/ pro-christian either ^^

god gave you minds, not to judge but to bring more people to the faith, what the hell are you bad-mouthing christians doing instead? oh yeah, you're all busy back-stabbing your *friends* and *family* and not to mention *fellow christians*. seriously doesn't it piss you off to know that some people have the NERVE to preach things they obviously have NO CLUE about?

you may be a fresh christian, but even so you are still a child in my book, if you have not matured enough, then dont you DARE say bad things about other christians. if this is the way we feel like living, then we damn well will continue, who gives a damn what you think, suck it up pussies. cause us vulgar/faith-questioners christians are fucking proud of who we are.

so what if we have dirty mouths
so what if we have doubts now and then
all that matters if that we still love god all the same.
nothing gives you the right to judge us and tell your friends that so-and-so is a bad christian cause she says "fuck" and doesn't go to church.
everyone has their own way of worship.
just because it is different doesn't make it wrong. you *self-righteous* people make me sick :)

think before you say.
just because ppl smile and say "nevermind lah!" doesn't mean it's ok to continue-.-
i just wish people would observe more............. >_>

Though me and * have decided that we are going straight down =D
Fingers crossed I say! =)

And I know the spark inside your eyes was just the match I used to set myself on fire!

2009-03-05T22:22:00.003+08:00

need. want. indifferent differences!

Halo ther, I didn't go to school today :]
heard from wekie that felicia and khaiqi didn't either u.u

obv fel pon (lulz)
and kq say she ill nao cause of me T_T
aww so sad get well soon then x.x

If one day you discover him
Broken down he's lost everything
No cars, no fancy clothes to make him who he's not
The woman at his side is all that he has got
Why do you ask him move heaven and earth
To prove his love has worth?

Would he walk on water
Would he run through fire
Would he stand before you
When it's down to the wire
Would he give his life up
To be all he can
Is that, is that, is that how you measure a man?

If by chance all he had to give you
Was three words wrapped around your finger
Would that be deep enough at the end of every day
And how will you ever know
If a man is what he says?

measure of a man - clay aiken

i am not gg to sch tmr :-O
seemingly i am having a relapse :(
albeit i've been taking my meds regularly ( i know right )

>End>
"Who does your heart beat for?"
who can honestly understand this question?

temerity \tuh-MER-uh-tee\, *noun

2009-03-04T20:20:00.003+08:00

..."You had the temerity of backstabbing your *bestie*"
DUMB-ASS MOVE SINCE EVERYONE KNOWS >_>
srsly!!!!!
okay redo-
.
.

Halo ther.
4/3/09 - 2nd day of camp (Excluding over thirty awsome people who aren't ther)
[Miss alll my friends.]

Because ther are such things as monsters =o

today I slept in class. Extremely Liberating
hahahahah if everybody was fucking docile then we would not need teachers. ):

tmr is like 90% Sleep-period.
I refuse to go :-O

since today I was so bored I went to check out Gay's horoscope (hahahaha yes)

1. Difficulties can arise if Virgo is too critical for Cancer's easily-bruised feelings; Cancer needs to understand that this is Virgo's nature and not a personal attack.
2. Virgo might dislike Cancer's stubborn streak but can learn to be patient and understanding of the Crab's nature.
3. Additionally, Virgo enjoys indulging Cancer -- the Virgo's commitment to service combines well with Cancer's love of nurturing, thus pleasing both.

apple juice!
1. obviously we just went through this :-O ~~so........... it was not personal?~~ K I'll stfu bout it alr hahaha xD
2. D: am not stubborn >:
3. yeaaaaaah. we are so seeing a lot of this gg on right now haha x)

onnn the upside -
i have made friends with 3j eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeelise and felicia koay
and trishushu hahahaha and nao i hav passed my sickness to khai qi......

sunny side up -_-
did i mention i hate wednesdays :-O

you are my favouriteeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

someday you'll sing it out loud (one day this'll make you proud)

2009-02-28T12:18:00.001+08:00

"I keep thinking of how much I love talking to you. How good you look when you smile. How much I love your laugh. I daydream about you off and on, replaying pieces of our conversations; laughing at funny things that you said or did. I've memorized your face and the way that you look at mine. I catch myself smiling again at what I imagine. I wonder what will happen the next time we are together and even though neither of us know what the future holds, I know one thing for sure; you're the best thing that has ever happened to me."

Just getting myself up for the letdown;

I am 100% aware of everything.
(just saying anything to get me by, ♥)

The way we move is so OUTRAGEOUS!

2009-02-21T15:11:00.003+08:00

What is your True Fear? Your Result: Losing Someone You love affection and the people in your life more than anything. Your greatest fear is that one day someone you care about won't be there anymore. You are a very friendly and inviting person, who draws in a lot of friendships with your kind, considerate, and loyal nature. However, deep down you are slightly insecure and unsure of yourself. You couldn't deal with it if you didn't have one of your loved ones in your life anymore. You don't have too much to worry about though, because with a friend like you, no one will want to lose you either!
Being Alone
Disappointment
Looked down on
Where Your life is Going
Commitment
Death
What is your True Fear? Quiz Created on GoToQuiz

x_x
Shutong was right ;o;
Perhaps I do care D:
I used to think my biggest fear was commitment; tbh, I loathe it.
Can't stand being tied down, it's too annoying D:

Anyways! OOC and OOT but wtv!
--------------------
Omfg! Geez, what the hell?! There seems to be a new class of people sprouting up from the youth of today >: It's sad ,really.

"They wear wide-rimmed glasses
They wear skinny jeans
They have bed-head hair
They listen to indie music and other music that hasn't even been invented yet
They wear ironic t-shirts that are too tight for them
They talk about their emotions and feelings
They're usually rich (or have rich parents) but usually spend their money trying to look not rich
Lots of times they wear makeup, especially guyliner
They pretty much only drink PBR (or maybe Miller High Life)
They sometimes have a lot of tattoos and piercings
They generally aren't athletic
Some hipsters are straight edge, some do coke"

Doesn't this just remind you of Scenesters/Posers/"Emoboys" x________x The hell, guyliner, do guys ENJOY looking like absolute pricks? I hate the skinny jeans part, seriously, you don't look hot, and you look like a dork that doesn't have enough money to buy a decent pair of jeans! It annoys me when I see guys wearing skinny jeans >_> Though I do try to keep my trap shut, I won’t say I hate it , but you’ll never see me drooling over some idiot in skinny jeans D:

"Some kids have huge record collections because they love music. They'll have the new bands and experimental sounds, yeah. But they'll also have huge back archives of blues, jazz, soul, roots rock, country, funk, psychedelic, bluegrass, etc. etc. etc. These are people that love music, and snap up the new stuff because they've already immersed themselves in the old. My old roommate was an encyclopedia of this stuff.

More "hipster" types sometimes follow whatever they read on Pitchfork (or other review sites) and don't bother to investigate music beyond the '80s. They tend to say things like "Music is my life" because, well, it sounds cool. And since with file sharing it's easier than ever to find out-of-the-way bands, they do so (although secretly they probably barely listen to half of them).”

Sucks to know that youth these days only listen to what they think is “in”. Just to give several examples, “Paramore”, “Panic! At The Disco” (Back in the days when the ‘!’ was still there) When P!ATD first came out, it was small, seriously small, and unknown. It wasn’t till by some miracle they became popular that everyone, and oh my god, I do mean everyone. Well those posers anyways but it was ANNOYING, I’m sure you felt that way. It was the exact same for Paramore. They were on purevolume one day, then shot up to the charts about 4 months later. You could say I was shocked. Like, “The hell? Why is everyone listening to them now?!” >_>

Granted there are further examples, like the oh-so notorious TWILIGHT! :o I would not go so far to say that I am a twilight hater, I would say I was a twilight-lover hater >;3 But “the more you read into the series , the more it seems that Stephenie Meyer is destroying the vampire genre. “(As some have put nicely). They don’t hate without reason though, you must understand, that the twilight-lovers have one way or another insulted them dearly.

“Friend: Hey, you should be paying attention, instead of reading.
Girl: Excuse me? I'm reading a twilight book....
Friend: So, I don't care, pay attention so you don't spend the next two hours asking us how to do this experiment, because i'll tell you to 'f' off.
Girl: What do you mean you don't care about twilight. Its the greatest series of books ever!
Friend: There crap. Love stories for teenagers to faint over. Your 19, act your age.
Girl: How dare you say twilight is crap! You don't know what your talking about! I'm going to fucking get you for saying that. You'll regret it prick. (She put the book away and glared with a look which could have punched through steel)
Me: Jeeze, just calm down. No need to get in a fluster over a bloody book...(whispering to my friend jokingly at the time) Be careful, i've heard some twilight fans are a bit bonkers, so she might 'get' you...
Friend: (laughing) Yeah, don't worry, I'll feint being scared later.

So we went back to listening, and we started the experiments. 20 minutes in everything was going fine. I looked over to the girl and she had beakers out, acid. I sighed thinking she didn't listen so she hadn't a clue what she was doing so she was doing the wrong things. I couldn't be bothered telling her what to do so I didn't say anything. 5 minutes later she said for my friend to turn around because she wanted to know something, so he did.

Suddenly in a fit of rage, she picked up a beaker full of acid, and screamed 'You bastard twilight hater!!!' and threw the whole beaker of acid in my friends face. He screamed, and tried to get away, however the girl, obviously not contempt with ruining his face, got a compass out and proceeded to stab him several times with the compass. I was in a state of shock, but somehow I managed to gain enough sense to be able to knock the compass out of her hand, and tackle her to the ground. she was kicking and screaming and clawing. The other people around jumped into help me. The lecturer dragged my friend to the emergency shower and tried to wash the acid off his face. Somebody ran to get the first aiders. Meanwhile we decided to move the girl, so I got off her and a few people grappled with her and moved her to the other side of the room, and stopped her from escaping. I sat down in shock, I couldn't believe that anyone could do anything like that, because of a book. I originally doubted some of the stories people had posted in here about being attacked, thinking they had made them up...but after seeing this, they are probably true...”

O: Scared now? Moar encounters @ http://twilightsucks.proboards81.com/index.cgi?board=fangirls

Scary ass people out there man x.x That’s one scenester gone WRONNNGG (awry) x_x

"I would define a hipster as a more affluent and obnoxious (although, at times interesting) relative of the beat culture of the 50's and 60's, while scenesters (the so-called fake hipsters) are merely imitating them because they think they're cool. If it was 10 years ago all the scenesters would be shopping at Hot Topic instead of Urban Outfitters."

Conclusion : Scenesters fucking fail. >_> And some are really scary if they believe in what they follow deeply!
Sources: http://www.lovebostongirl.com/2007/09/boys-wearing-skinny-jeans.html , http://twilightsucks.com etc & the likes :D

It was fun typing this x_x
I know some parts are off-topic but I couldn't resist! Roahhhh! (Between a roar and a cry) ;)

Being official is just a status. O:
If you wanna then sure, I don't rly give damn (:
[As Long As I'm With You]

I'm sure you've got some place that you'd probably rather be

2009-02-20T22:09:00.000+08:00

!!! Thanks bros :> Thank you Shutong (You rly helped out a lot x.x) & Sunshine x_x.
Thank you Gay & Shiggy for telling me your feelings X_X Even though it was hard, thanks again bros :D

!! Recently almost get full mark for pao zhang pao dao X_X
9.5/10
Wekie & Clement "Walao gwen why always show your one x_x"
J Tan "Gwen yours ah O_O"
Lallalallaaa x_x" not my fault :D
Though it does feel nice to know that when people read thru their chinese/revise, they'd be reading MY WORDS!!! x)
Gotta admit that's awesome :D
After ytd/day bef's drama, I'm in top form again :>
It's unparalled, I srsly think noone could rival this O:

! Having fun on MSN (Srsly distracting from studying but wtv, I've been paying attention in class :> )
gwenny? : you must say
gwenny? : "i miss you too!!"
~+_.PanDa++++ Squarish Circle : i miss you too
~+_.PanDa++++ Squarish Circle : !!
gwenny? : yay!!!!!
gwenny? : !!!!!
gwenny? : okay now add moar feeling
gwenny? : +30 points
~+_.PanDa++++ Squarish Circle : i MISS YOU TOOOOO !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
gwenny? : YEAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!
gwenny? : +40 points you did good :D
~+_.PanDa++++ Squarish Circle : YEAHHHHHHHHHHHH
~+_.PanDa++++ Squarish Circle : THATS THE WAY BITCH!!!!!!!!!!
~+_.PanDa++++ Squarish Circle : i bet i just lost all my points
~+_.PanDa++++ Squarish Circle : hahahhahaaha

~!Miss you a lot,
Torture without you >:

Love between the sheets ~Show me something that's unique

2009-02-17T20:45:00.004+08:00

CRYSTAL GET WELL SOON MOM :D

Nooooooooooooooooo. God damn you Google, Seriously, when one types "CD Rack" in your shit ass search engine, it does not necessarily mean that we want to fucking buy one right -_-" Every (almost) result entry is selling CD Racks D: How am I supposed to do my god damn research (DNT) when Google is being an insensitive jerk! >'; Aww D:

Yessssssssssssssss. So far best examinable topics are SS, MT, CHEM.!!!!!!!!!!!!! lol 8) anw Clement is now known as Edmund (Magic) or Clarence (Chem) D: Oh about ytd's pissing off of Gay :D Cause some cher confiscated lighter so I was unscathed =) lalalalallala xD Dion came online on Y!M today yay! :D Talked to me on msn , old man x_X He had to go off awfully quick though. I guess that's what you get for wanting all A's for your seven subjects O_O

Today lol so funny I didn't want to take PE and said I was sick (Which I am, technically 8D) Mr Tng didn't even ask why I wasn't in PE O_O Right lol, srsly =.= Many ppl didn't take today o_o; Like Wenshan (feel sick), Jared (got MC), Xiankai (got MC), Anlin (idk) O: so we 5 "sick" people shit on bench talk cock while Xk and Anlin study a bit O: Observe a bit of soccer by 3H boys, talk a bit of Chem/Amy and Jared ran off a couple of times throw javelin -_- Raymond so nice go help him talk and cover O:

I have taken to

Saying "Annoying" instead of "Irritating"
- Because "irritating" seems so unrefined :[
Greeting my friends with a "Graaawwwrr" and a poke in the sides :D

Okay that's just my recent changes O:
Imma start saying "neat" instead of "cool" now.

Just cause it sounds neater =P

&..~
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

" roses are sweet
so like your soul
throw out the sugar
and put you in the bowl "

I think I can die happy now O_O
Srsly

I'm falling in love But its falling apart

2009-02-16T21:36:00.002+08:00

omg omg omg gavin don't kill me x.x
waaaah D;
sorry sorry :(
don't kill me/set me on fire/set my stuff on fire/beat me up X_X

;o; So mean

i picked you up and lifted your wilted frame into the sun. i was taken back, yeah i was taken back,

2009-02-15T14:31:00.005+08:00

DeadMansHand says : haha, last night, me and pete went out to celebrate his engagement and got hugely drunk, we got this great idea to bury eachother in the sand close to the water and see who would chicken out first, took about a half hour, but the water got up to my face so i freaked and got out. i looked around for pete and he must've chickened out before me and stumbled home or something heh.. What'd he say when he woke up this morning?

Thirteen- says : uhh.. he hasn't come home yet.. i thought he was staying with you?

DeadMansHand says: holy fuck. i fucking hope im wrong about what im thinking right now, im fucking going back to the beach to make sure, if he gets home, call me, i don't want to be worrying about this

Thirteen- says : will do. you better hope he's not still buried, you'll be in deep shit.

quit: (DeadMansHand)

Tyran says : wtf? pete came home last night you fuck. Ken's going to be worrying about this shit all day

Thirteen- says : haha yea, but it will be fun while it lasts

join: (PeteRepeat)

PeteRepeat says : fucking ken! ken... that fucker buried me in the sand last night, i ran off about 5 minutes to it, left him there to be an idiot

quiqsilver says : pete, ken didn't come back last night, i thought he was with you.

PeteRepeat says : oh fuck. if ken shows up, make sure he doesn't know that im at the beach digging for his body. i don't want him to think i care or anything.

quit: (PeteRepeat)

Thirteen- says : rofl. Those 2 are going to get a huge surprise when they meet at the beach.

Tyran says : i can't believe how perfect their timing was

lol fucking funny xD
yay GHeartsB :D

At least I do :D

Because I'm young and stupid and really good at making bad decisions.

2009-02-14T07:49:00.004+08:00

Kick start my heart :]

Happy loveday o-o;
Aww I'm so happy.

Presents were:
smexy lolly and packet of sweets from nadira (L)
cookie from crystal (OM NOM NOM)
cookies from indah and jiaying (OM NOM NOM)
ferror roche from jiepin, ice princess (OM NOM NOM)
"my heart for you"from bryan {:

There are days when I'm so glad I met you guys:D
Muahahah :D
I love you all :D

And... *below*

It bothers me when ......

1. Friends
- True, given that I do gossip a lot, you don't see me spreading malicious gossip about my friends often :o Rarely even. So it does kinda irk me when friends back-stab o-o; Back-stabbing is like screwing yourself over if that friend knows secrets about you too o-o`.

I don't exactly complain much but lately every girl I know (except some really lovely ones ily!) is turning into ... ._. I can't even find the word to describe it. Perhaps it's because I come from an all-girls' school that I have seemingly developed this kind of mentality =/ To me, by right girls should treat their girlfriends better than they treat guys =o

Given a chance of a guy and a girl to spend life on a deserted island, I'd rather fuck the world and pick the girl (ftw in the sense that I am stopping reproduction of humanity but wtv lol). Because as it is, I'd really prefer having some girltalk than having cryptic talks/talks that barely skim the surface because boys my age are not at that stage where they are capable of having serious talks. :/

That is my two cents' worth :( I've been thinking a lot about it o_o;

2. Haters
How the hell do people jump from hating 1 girl, to being her best friend? Face it, it's not being ultra-forgiving, it's being ultra-FAKE. It's fucking superficial to hate Girl A for a given number of days and suddenly decide that *Oh, I've had enough, this has got to stop, I'm gunna be nice nao* Oh rly nao? What bullshit -.- You can't just stop the campaign you've been running to drive the girl to the ground o_o; (But apparantly girls find that ultra easy, what shit)

When I see my pals hating, granted, I do join in sometimes, but then they suddenly decide that they've worked things out, it's smoothed over. Fuck, how god damn superficial is that. You hurt someone's feelings; There's not such thing as "Im sorry for giving you hell". Unless it was a super heart-felt apology, I sincerely doubt noone would be able to stomach that. Perhaps even a "Fuck you leave me alone" would be fitting -.-!

Alright I'm done for today~~
Happy (L)Day once more =)

" yeah im gonna hit the sack i love you "
:o you made my day :>

alright, okay , Gunna give you a taste of my heartbreak

2009-02-08T21:43:00.004+08:00

~ Guilty(: says:
MY NEXT ONE WILL BE
~ Guilty(: says:
blackunderwear@hotmail.com
natalya; my best friend's hot says:
HAHAH SERIOUS?!
natalya; my best friend's hot says:
homg that is so cute
natalya; my best friend's hot says:
hahha i can be pinkunderwear@hotmail.com :DDD
~ Marry me, if you please(: says:
yeah
~ Marry me, if you please(: says:
then we would match xD
~ Marry me, if you please(: says:
heck i put as my msn nick nao
~ Marry me, if you please(: says:
HAHAHA
natalya; my best friend's hot says:
hahahha yeah yeah xD
natalya; my best friend's hot says:
me too!
~ blackunderwear(: says:
muahah
~ blackunderwear(: says:
HAHAHAH'
natalya; pink underwear says:
this is so cute!
natalya; pink underwear says:
eh i'm wearing pink boxers now!
natalya; pink underwear says:
omg!
~ blackunderwear(: says:
i ...
~ blackunderwear(: says:
im not wearing underwear
~ blackunderwear(: says:
O_O
natalya; pink underwear says:
GWEN!

don't worry i am fully clothed.

Now like a freedom phoenix burning from a rising sun Here is my vindication (I hate you)

2009-02-07T17:52:00.003+08:00

If your heart lies somewhere else, go with it.

~~I don't care anymore.~~

god dammit don't fucking leave me jerk face.

Nobody wants to hear this, but sometimes the person you want the most is the person you're best without.

2009-02-06T21:57:00.000+08:00

~ LickMe:] says:
NAO
~ LickMe:] says:
NAO
~ LickMe:] says:
NAO
饒舌 says:
i AM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
~ LickMe:] says:
NAO LA
~ LickMe:] says:
!!!!
饒舌 says:
i am lah
~ LickMe:] says:
NAO
~ LickMe:] says:
!!!
~ LickMe:] says:
>;o
饒舌 says:
YES LAH !
~ LickMe:] says:
fuck you NOW.
~ LickMe:] says:
lol
~ LickMe:] says:
ok that came out wrong

self-pwnage xD

shit i need to sleep.

sometimes all you can see is whats on the surface but once you get close enough you learn that what you once saw was but a mask to hide .

2009-02-05T22:32:00.002+08:00

neko boy! so cuteee !~

pwnage o-o
i fail amath u.u
was not unexpected, btw.

~pet~ilickedher says:
xD what would you like me to do when im naked

wow i will have a good day tmr that's for sure O_O

Well, what can I say? You changed. I went one way and you went the other way. Maybe this is how it's supposed to be? I guess we'll never find out.

2009-02-04T18:18:00.003+08:00

i was bored o-o

Dreamy Idealist (DI)

Dreamy Idealists are very cautious and therefore often appear shy and reserved to others. They share their rich emotional life and their passionate convictions with very few people. But one would be very much mistaken to judge them to be cool and reserved. They have a pronounced inner system of values and clear, honorable principles for which they are willing to sacrifice a great deal. Joan of Arc or Sir Galahad would have been good examples of this personality type. :D Dreamy Idealists are always at great pains to improve the world. They can be very considerate towards others and do a lot to support them and stand up for them. They are interested in their fellow beings, attentive and generous towards them. Once their enthusiasm for an issue or person is aroused, they can become tireless fighters.

For Dreamy Idealists, practical things are not really so important. They only busy themselves with mundane everyday demands when absolutely necessary. They tend to live according to the motto “the genius controls the chaos” - which is normally the case so that they often have a very successful academic career. They are less interested in details; they prefer to look at something as a whole. This means that they still have a good overview even when things start to become hectic. However, as a result, it can occasionally happen that Dreamy Idealists overlook something important. As they are very peace-loving, they tend not to openly show their dissatisfaction or annoyance but to bottle it up. Assertiveness is not one of their strong points; they hate conflicts and competition. Dreamy Idealists prefer to motivate others with their amicable and enthusiastic nature. Whoever has them as superior will never have to complain about not being given enough praise.

As at work, Dreamy Idealists are helpful and loyal friends and partners, persons of integrity. Obligations are absolutely sacred to them. The feelings of others are important to them and they love making other people happy. They are satisfied with just a small circle of friends; their need for social contact is not very marked as they also need a lot of time to themselves. Superfluous small talk is not their thing. If one wishes to be friends with them or have a relationship with them, one would have to share their world of thought and be willing to participate in profound discussions. If you manage that you will be rewarded with an exceptionally intensive, rich partnership. Due to their high demands on themselves and others, this personality type tends however to sometimes overload the relationship with romantic and idealistic ideas to such an extent that the partner feels overtaxed or inferior. Dreamy Idealists do not fall in love head over heels but when they do fall in love they want this to be a great, eternal love.

Adjectives which describe your type

introverted, theoretical, emotional, spontaneous, idealistic, dreamy, effusive, pleasant, reserved, friendly, passionate, loyal, perfectionist, helpful, creative, composed, curious, obstinate, with integrity, willing to make sacrifices, romantic, cautious, shy, peace-loving, vulnerable, sensitive, communicative, imaginative

O: i just made everything that i seem blue :)

aft this i shall do my hwk finish and read finish the last black cat cause i just realized that it's nice o-o

crap i have to go to mama's house for dinner :/
i will be bored T.T

factorial_nine: "Male masturbation is a personal turn off for me. As a single woman, I'm especially looking for a man who doesn't masturbate, even while he's single."
factorial_nine: GOOD LUCK, BITCH.

Hate is just a word for someone you love, but no longer believe in.

2009-02-03T21:05:00.002+08:00

made me laugh so hard.

"Call me every night like a best friend should. Tell me your secrets, because it's the right thing to do. Let's be best friends forever until the end. We'll be the fakest ones anyone has seen."

o-o
"why so quiet"
i was lost
nadira you brought me back

somebody noticed o-o
--------------------------------

lol i am having amusing conversations.
quickquick details of my life.
always people take one look at me and say i look like i very sporty o-o
so weird
i am ~~fucking~~ unfit o-o
shit that was impolite.
nevermind i striked it out.

haha less talk moar listen.
-----------------------------------

i gone nao cause bryan is here and............
bye

Don't sell it out, and curse the hand that waivers growth, I won't trade this for the world cause this is just my world

2009-02-02T20:41:00.002+08:00

goddamn.
nobody is taking me seriously.

i am not a happy goober.

If love be rough with you, be rough with love. Prick love for pricking and you beat love down.

2009-02-02T19:35:00.000+08:00

i feel awkward and belligerent.
i have no idea why i am smiling so much, laughing so hard.
it exhausts me.
frankly, given a choice to be happy or nonchalant,
i'd give anything to be nonchalant.

now i know how shiggy does it.
it's so much more less tiring.

to just not care,
to show no emotion.

on another note i've been worried about myself;
barely scraping thru school but i dont find myself worrying T.T
shouldn't i be more worried? o-o

i don't know.
i seriously feel like dropping everything and not caring anymore

so this is how it feels like to be completely resigned from life.

i dont want to care anymore
-------------
perhaps... i don't know
"Thank god for offline msging"

i hate having to wait
every
weekend

i wish weekends lasted forever

well today i popped by shooting to check on the sec1s o-o
needless to say i was disappointed o-o
(not something i'm unfamiliar to)

the girls are cute; not my type of crowd though
oh my pants i must be getting old :/

sec1s `09 are so annoying u.u

needless to say i miss you O:

Its like we do a dance where no one wants to move but if i take the first step Maybe we can find a groove Im really trying hard to not just walk away

2009-02-01T21:53:00.000+08:00

god dammit if you have a problem don't fucking take it out on me.

on a brighter note Bryan totally made my day xD
Thank you for staying up to 4am talking to me, love.

Jebuss let's just leave people who read this with a thought ;
if you knew you were capable of hurtful words, would you say them?
i mean seriously -_-"
don't just take it out on someone coz you wanna feel big...
that's just lame and childish o-o

alright im gone

you got teabagged ;)

2009-01-23T14:12:00.000+08:00

walao I neglect my blog like shit D:
*wipes dust off*

anyways pics pics pics!
i have quit mf; if you haven't heard xD

last 2 screenies :]

&... today I ended school at 10am.
homed at 1015 and from then on I msned w pet & T ^_^

SOOOO CUTE XD
& if you're wondering why I suddenly said "assh!" it's coz
he stood up, Naked. well w underpants and went off to get sth xD!
haha would've typed asshole but i closed my eyes xD!

Alright today has been a fairly awesome week =]
Ilovemyfriendsverymuch <3

KAMIKAZE ATTACK ME =)

2009-01-02T18:06:00.000+08:00

do u like games no
do u like halo no
do u like guns no
do u like teddy bears yes
WOW WE HAVE SO MUCH IN COMMON

What would you do if you were me?

2009-01-02T16:15:00.000+08:00

jfshine15!

DONT FORGET :O

TODAY WAS AWESOME
I love you 2c pplz so much
I never realized how much I missed you all <3 <3

When you hold me like you do It feels so right, oh now Start to forget how my heart gets torn When that hurt gets thrown

2008-12-26T22:02:00.000+08:00

Gone from 27 to 30/31 :3
Today was MUCH MUCH MUCH better.
Even tho P didn't sho ._.

We made up and I'm happy again {:
<3 <3 <3

Should I smile because you're my friend? Or cry because that's all we'll ever be?

2008-12-25T22:26:00.000+08:00

P omg, I rly need you here with me & you're not here.
It's not your fault or anything.
You probably had to go.
But it hurts when there's noone there to bear this pain with me T~T
& the people you thought cared , didn't. T~T

God tmr I'll rant so HARD to you , P.
I hope you don't mind T____T

--------
Baby I just don't get it
Do you enjoy being hurt?
I know you smelled the perfume
The make-up on his shirt
You don't believe his stories
You know that they're all lies
Bad as you are, you stick around and I just don't know why

Christmas Eve pt 1

2008-12-24T23:42:00.000+08:00

- Fantaji~ /. walking along the road. says:
marry christmas.
gwenD: Baby's got her gun out ;D says:
Yes I would luv to marry you
gwenD: Baby's got her gun out ;D says:
LMAO
gwenD: Baby's got her gun out ;D says:
jk
- Fantaji~ /. walking along the road. says:
LAWL

Lmao I kno I'm lame XD!!

When you kiss me on that midnight street Sweep me off my feet, Singin' ain't this life so sweet?

2008-12-22T16:05:00.000+08:00

Lmao I've been wanting to do this for a long time x.x

Must Luv Guys
William Beckett (duh)
Adam Lazarra ~
Frank Iero !
Danny Phantom (rofl rofl)
&...

My fav eva x3..

BEN 10
aka Ben Tennison xD

:D
K I'm bored o.@"

austin was a jerk today .-.
we are not friends anymore o.o
apparently ,

but his bro is still my friend (thank God)
pshhh austin you can take your stupid face and shove it up your ass x_x

my eyes hurt T.T
im out till 430 or so .-.
xx

Every minute - every single second - there are a million things you could be thinking about. A million things you could be worrying about.

2008-12-20T22:37:00.000+08:00

I have to admit, my mood is pretty cruddy T.T
But Mal cheers me up :)

please be with me tonight x.x

Why waste a second not loving who you are : those little imperfections make you beautiful, lovable, valuable,

2008-12-19T12:41:00.000+08:00

Hai I'm here to blog about ytd since I forgot
Well K I didnt "forget" but I usually blog at 12am & ytd I got off at 1130pm x_x

Quotes from the day starting from morning
"im lost."
"turn right cross the road then turn left walk"
"wtf why everybody late"
"Hello where u? k nvm i buy tix first"
"Hi where u? im at the travellator thr"
"Huh where?im thr too"
"OH!" "OH!"
"Wah long line let's see who can stop Shiggy first"
"THERE! HE'S THAT TALL ONE!"
"no la shiggy not that tall "
"oh you're right there he is."
---------
went sembawang
"*shows fob new cd* eh look fall out boy damn bastard"
bought it :P
-------------
lunch @ ljs (well you gotta bear in mind we were out with SHIGGY)
didnt eat much x_x
:/

A lot of horny talk lmao
Mostly slagging shutong =X!
But who cares ;)
We had fun lawl

"can i buy you underwear for your birthday? O_O" jk
----------------

lawl lawl K then like damn funny XD
movie was okie

"shiggy will you wear a maid outfit for money?"
"no.. um.. how much?"
LMAO!!1! XD

Gay and sunshine are having probs XD
Tch the married couple :O

Kay then after that homed w Glenn Shiggy Ritesh coz Sunshine take bus e.e
glenn and ritesh keep talking about xbox games >: o
They're gonna play pool today x.x
Bored now.

K imma out <3

Tell me am i right, to think that there could be nothing better?

2008-12-17T22:22:00.000+08:00

Lawl XD!!
Ytd night's group convo =)
With Amir, Jenny & Teven

We were so fking random!
"Batman nekkid upside down.. NO!!! with only his belt! on a spider web with Spiderman!"
XD! lmfao ~

But this was ytd.
I have no fking idea what happened while I was out with Jabby but..
Now sth's wrong.
I have no idea why.. hai~

Anyway went out with Jabby today =)

Today was exactly what I needed...
A DAY WITH GWEN :D

We went to parkway and well I don't like going parkway for fear I will bump into someone.
Waited for Gwen at borders when she totally surprised me !
I let out a bad word :O

We saw a girl who I thought was Tara.
"Nah that's just another indian girl who looks like Tara. Tara has huge boobs!"
x)

From her blog xD

Bef I met w her I was playing =o
& he said Hi to me O_O
I was like "WOAH OMG *freak out*"
xD He's a scary kid.

Kay I'm out <3
Maybe going out tmr? e.e

Hope so lawls.

Now I wish I woulda talked to him ; gave him the time of day ; not turn away

2008-12-16T20:55:00.000+08:00

I swear he only talks to me to degrade/make me feel lousy&stupid.
& if it's not that he just talks to me to get a chance to do just that.

& when pplz diss me,
He gets all huffy.
I bet it's coz he wants to be the only one who disses me.
x_x

I'm at a loss.

On the bright side tmr I'm going out with Jabby <3

It's gold and it's glowing with all the life you have left

2008-12-15T22:29:00.000+08:00

Hah he talked to me today
I feel so warm inside :P
Nah not rly xD

I know you want it just as badly as I do. What I don't know is why you can't take a chance on me.

2008-12-14T23:21:00.000+08:00

I never told anyone (until today)
That he made me cry

He doesn't know
Nobody
Knows

Well today was great coz M came back from his holiday! <3 <3
I missed him sooo much =]
Bitched a lot to him yeps.

Just now Jabby called me =)
Bitched a hella lot lmao!
Made me laugh so hard :D
:D

My heart is yours to fill or burst

2008-12-13T22:43:00.000+08:00

Lol can't fcking join.
& if you realized, I've got like 3 proz on my team :P
T, Jolle, BOBO :D

lmao got stuck in a glitch and fell to my death e.e

Malvix no scoped 6-0 v.v

check out rm 25's name lol
i beat amos in a 1v1 and he still calls me nub e.e
now we cool =]

yellow team was sooo stacked.
i couldnt win it :/

Well I leveled.
On my way to mf top 100 :]

bleeding wrists

2008-12-13T00:10:00.000+08:00

You know you're doing good when you get a 25-3 ;
out-pwning the best gunner on mf , Sunday, who has a 22-19.

Dude I did AWESOME :]
Too bad my team screwed up and lost ess Lol.
If not we would've won =)

Geez I'm better at sniping then gunning I guess :/
But I'm getting better at jump-shooting ^^

Ciao xx

I feel stupid and contagious :

2008-12-11T19:58:00.001+08:00

Man today's morning was WONDERFUL! <3 style="font-weight: bold;">Aein so swt XD!
I found a new gf alr kekez.

F was being gey as usual,
'lemme poon you'
'imma pwn you then poon you'
xDD!

M breaks my heart by saying ___________ T~T
Ah, wdv xD

C was so cute uh XD
Can't explain but he was so LOL~

I miss A e.e
I nv see her anymore T~T

K imma outz ciao~

And my heaven is a nice house in the sky

2008-12-10T21:36:00.000+08:00

My sis threw nailclipper at my head and it hurts like hell .
;_;

tdy i puked my lunch out becoz of crazy pain cramps x_x
rly felt like // my wrists RIGHT THERE & THEN.

mm wna complain to A right now.
ciao xx

Maybe we won't survive

2008-12-09T13:16:00.000+08:00

x.x I'm bored.
S's birthday passed. Happy birthday xD
S's birthday passed. Happy birthday :]
S's birthday passed. Happy birthday <3

Check the colours and you'll know which S is which xD

yush says:
got no mor cake

break my heart T~T
Okay gg out with Natalya one day :D
My donut+fakestick luvver <3

"Give me my money back, give me back my money back, you bitch"
x.x Ben Folds Five

Maybe just maybe I'll start blogging again.

Maybe.